MusicalBethan talks about Sexting and it’s consequences.
Hi :) So I have this one guy bestfriend who im very close with & we spend a lot of time talking & we tell each other everything. We became close when he started expressing his feelings about this 1 girl hes been crushing on for years to me & i on the other hand, express my feelings about my boyfriend to him. When i broke up with my bf, my bestfriend literally became the person i look for when i get sad and just wanna bawl my eyes out and he was always,always there for me! he listened and gave me advises and made sure i didnt do anything stupid.
Remainder of the question under the cut:
From the sounds of things you’ve got an awfully complicated situation on your hand. After a break up, I know how hard it can be to be alone, and I know that, when a guy friend lends you his shoulder to lean on, it’s easy to find yourself wondering why you never looked their way in the first place.
My advice to you would be to take some time on your own, some time to evaluate the situation as a whole and your feelings for both your ex and your friend, including whether or not you are willing to chance a friendship by trying a relationship.
The only thing I can really stress is this: Make sure that your feelings for your friend are genuine, not just because he was there for you during a rough patch. Make sure the situation is worth risking a friendship over.
Most importantly, take some time out to make sure that you are okay after all of this emotional stress. At the end of the day, it is your own wellbeing that will dictate future events.
Love you! Good luck :)
Hey lovely :)
You’re most certainly not alone in feeling this way. We all have insecurities, fears, vulnerabilities. It only really takes one blow to break trust, and maybe this guy was it for you.. as a result, you’ve put up walls to avoid getting hurt, to protect yourself. I totally get that, it really, really sucks, putting yourself on the line for a person only to discover it was all a lie.
The truth is, you are a wonderful human being with so many amazing qualities. I know that there are people around you that can see that, the sad part is that you can’t. To learn to accept compliments and let people in requires you to recognise that you are a person worthy of love and friendship. I am telling you now that you are.
When you put yourself out there, you are bound to experience both joy and hurt, happiness and disappointment. My only advice to you is to not lose faith in yourself or others because of that disappointment. There are people out there who love and accept you for the amazing person you are. It’s just up to you to be able to see all of the amazing qualities that they see, it’s up to you to let them in. Please let them in, you deserve to be happy.
I love you <3 Stay strong beautiful!
First off, I want to send you my love and condolences for your friend from home, grief at any level is one of the toughest things in the world to process <3 Secondly, I want you to know how insanely proud I am of you for the steps you’ve taken in recovering so far. I know sometimes it feels like ‘one step forward, two steps back’ but the fact that you have been able to take any step forward inspiring. You’re beautiful <3.
Your roommates, I want to kick in the ass. No one deserves to be treated like this. Firstly, if they’re not aware of what is going on, then I suggest you tell them. You don’t have to tell them everything, just perhaps enough to get them to back off of your case. What they’re doing is nothing short of bullying and you don’t deserve that, especially not in the wake of everything you’re going through. No one deserves that.
Secondly, if you’re living on campus or in a dorm (as you mentioned that they were college roommates), report them to an RA or a college counsellor. Sometimes it just helps to have a higher authority aware of the situation, as well as the one you, yourself are struggling through. I know it is hard to speak out, but staying quiet only makes things worse. Trust me <3
Alternatively, you can make other living arrangements. People like your roommates are toxic and you should not have to deal with them every day.
Lastly, I just want you to know that I love you. You are beautiful, brave and strong and you do not deserve any of this. Don’t be afraid to reach out to someone and let them know what is going on at college, at home and with yourself. Everyone deserves a shoulder to lean on, including you. You do not need to go through this alone.
Stay strong, I love you <3
The thing with texting is you can never be sure if people who you have sent the text to have actually read it yet. Perhaps they are busy? Perhaps some of them aren’t sure how to respond.
Have you tried calling any of them, to talk about it? Perhaps call the person you are closest to, you could even put your number on private if it were too nerve-wracking.
I can guarantee, they DO care about you. I care about you. Don’t you ever think that your presence isn’t felt or valued on this earth. You are a beautiful human being who has been given a life to live. You are beautiful and strong and worthy of all of what life has to offer. I promise you that.
No, you don’t want to OD. You are worth so much more then that. There are so, so many people who would be devastated if you were never to wake up. Death or escaping may end your pain, but it is only the beginning of a world of pain for the people who care about you.… please come off anon so we can chat? You are stronger then this, and you deserve to live, you deserve to choose life.
Hey love <3
First i wanted to say that I’m sorry that you’re going through what you’re going through.. and I completely understand where you are coming from. Once upon a time I was in your situation. Telling people and actually being able to talk about it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.. sometimes the people we love the most are the ones who it is most difficult to tell, simply because we want to protect them.
I will tell you though, once I had told people it was like some sort of weight had been lifted. The symptoms were still there, but people knew why I was acting the way I was and I didn’t have to pretend anymore. Some people may walk away, but the ones who really love you will stay. If anything, they will just love you more for being honest with them. By letting people in you are building yourself a support network of people you can turn to. You shouldn’t have to face this alone.
Just give it a go <3 You don’t have to tell everyone.. just one person is a start. Honesty is always the best policy.
I’m proud of you for fighting, and I know you can keep doing so. Love you lots and let me know how it goes xx
First off, I want to let you know I’m sorry for yours and your fiancee’s loss. Losing a loved one is devastating. The best advice I can give you is to encourage him to get help, make sure that he knows how much you love him. Right now, what he needs more then anything is love and support. He needs to know that you’re there for him and when he’s ready, you’re there to talk- and that there are plenty of people out there who want to help him too. Make sure he has a good support network around him- whether that means friends, family, professionals.
Remind him that his mother would want him to live his life to the fullest and to the best of his ability, and that she loved him very much.
The only real healer for these kinds of things is time- time and love. Thanks to you he has love.
Lastly, make sure that if you’re feeling the pressure of all of this that you talk to someone. He needs you to stay strong too, and make sure that you look after yourself as well. I know sometimes it’s hard and your own stuff gets lost in the shuffle, but trust me when I say it’s important.
Good luck with everything beautiful <333 and let me know how he is. Don’t be afraid to speak up and reach out. Stay strong. I know that you can both get through this.
First off, no question is stupid <3 and I am glad you came here to talk.
The best advice I can give you is just to be honest.. the longer you put off the conversation, the more nervous you are when you actually sit down to do it. Just be upfront and honest with them, but make sure they know that it may not be what you call a “full relapse”. Just remember, that any type of relapse is serious <3
If you have trouble bringing it up, or worried that you won’t be able to get things across, you could always try writing them a letter? That way, you can say what you need to say in your own words, free of interruption.
Remember, honestly is always the best policy- and stay strong <33
You can leave a message on anon- or we can even talk privately :)
I listen. I care. I love you. Don’t be afraid to message me for advice <3
Drop them in the submit box and share them around! :) Tell us what inspires you and keeps you going we shall post it!
Drop them here
Hey lovely <3
First off, I wanted to let you know that I’m sorry to hear about your best friend. i know how that feels and how much it sucks. Secondly, I wanted to tell you that even though you feel like a pest- you’re not at all. Clearly, he has some issues of his own and can’t seem to appreciate you for who you really are. You deserve better then that kind of treatment.
i’d recommend you talk to your friend about what’s going on- maybe it’s all a big mistake? If not, at least you’ll have the truth, right? just remember that there are people out there who are going to appreciate you for who you really are and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Take the opportunity to go out, broaden your horizons and meet new people ! <3
Stay strong :) and lemme know how it goes!
Lots of love
I have been through CAMHS actually :) I spent Seven/Eight months there between February and October 2012. For those of you who don’t know, CAMHs is short for ‘Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services’ and it’s a department of government dedicated to, as the name suggest, helping children dealing with serious mental health issues. As far as I am aware, CAMHS operates in Australia, Britain and New Zealand.
My experience with CAMHS was largely a positive one. I was referred to Camhs after a prescription-drug overdose in December 2011 and was eventually admitted to their outpatient program in February the following year.
At the time, I have to note, that I was very angry, lost and confused.. i probably wasn’t the easiest person to deal with. While my initial assessment was less then pleasant and I really didn’t want to return, I agreed to stick it out for at least a few sessions for my family’s sake- and I’m really glad I did.
So, after the initial interview process, you’re invited back for an ‘assessment’ after which they will take your case to the board and decide whether or not you are eligible to be put on to their roster or put you on a waiting list. Then you are usually assigned a case-worker. I struck it lucky with my case-worker and it wound up being someone who I felt, by the end of it, I could trust.
Camhs really helped me. I got the therapy I needed, I was able to consult with a psychiatrist to get my medication sorted and I managed to work through a fair few of my issues.
The best advice I can give you about CAMHS or any mental health service is to go in with an open mind. I know it’s hard and, like me, you may not WANT to be there. Just remember that these people, even if they do seem detached, do want to help you- so just give them a chance <3 They can help you- if you let them :)
Stay strong! Give it a chance and let me know how it goes :)